Believing in Yourself

I understand that self-doubt can be a challenging hurdle, and it’s not uncommon to feel like your confidence and self-esteem are lacking. If this resonates with you, I encourage you to read through to the end. I’m here to share insights on how to nurture self-belief.

Self Doubt Starts With Your Thoughts

The root of self-doubt often lies in our thoughts. On average, we have about 50,000 thoughts per day, and a staggering 95% of these are repetitive. These thoughts, often negative, can be deeply ingrained, stemming from past experiences. Perhaps a tough rejection or critical feedback from parents led you to believe you’re not good enough, or multiple attempts to break a habit left you feeling powerless. These thoughts from the past can linger, influencing your present mindset.

Your thoughts have a powerful impact on your actions. If you’re constantly thinking, “I’m not strong enough,” it can lead to behaviors that reinforce this belief, like avoiding challenges or staying inactive. This cycle of negative thinking and behavior can be self-perpetuating. Allow me to illustrate with this story:

While walking near some elephants, a man paused, struck by the sight of these enormous animals restrained only by slender ropes tied to their front legs. No heavy chains or cages were in sight, just these thin ropes. It was evident that the elephants could easily break free, yet they made no such attempt, which surprised him.

Curious, he approached a nearby trainer and inquired why the elephants didn’t try to escape. The trainer shared, “When they’re young and small, we use these ropes to tie them. At that age, the ropes are strong enough. As they grow, they’re conditioned to believe they can’t break free, so they don’t even try.”

This revelation left the man in awe. As he walked away, he reflected on how the elephants could liberate themselves at any moment but didn’t due to their beliefs. He realized this mirrors how people often don’t pursue success after a single failure, believing they can never achieve it. This mindset, much like the elephants’ belief in the strength of the rope, traps them.

He concluded, “To succeed in life, never let yourself think you can’t. Your belief is what holds you back. Always keep trying and don’t be bound by the false belief that you’re incapable.” Mahatma Gandhi once said “A man is but the product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes.”

“A man is but the product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes.”

Mahatma Gandhi

The good news is that you can transform your thought patterns. It’s entirely possible to shift from “I’m not strong enough” to “I am capable and strong.” However, it’s important to acknowledge that this change won’t happen overnight. It takes time and effort to replace long-held beliefs with new, positive ones.

Here’s a step-by-step approach to help you on this journey:

•  Step #1 Identify Your Current Self-Talk: Pay attention to your thoughts throughout the day. Identify the most common negative thoughts and write them down.
• Step # 2 Choose New, Positive Thoughts: Reflect on these negative thoughts and determine their positive opposites. For instance, change “I am weak” to “I am strong.”
• Step # 3 Gather Evidence for Your New Thoughts: Look for small, everyday actions that prove your new, positive thoughts. Completing a workout, for instance, can reinforce the belief that you are strong.
• Step # 4 Reinforce New Thoughts with Evidence: Each time you find evidence, remind yourself of your new thought. For example, after a workout, affirm, “I am strong.”
• Step # 5 Repeat and Reinforce: Continue to gather evidence and reinforce your new thoughts. This process takes time, but it’s about building a new habit of positive thinking.

Changing your mindset is akin to building a habit. It might be challenging, but it’s a crucial step towards believing in yourself. 

Additionally, exposing yourself to new perspectives, such as through audiobooks, can be incredibly beneficial. Services like Audible offer a vast range of books and wellness programs that can support you in this journey. They even have a selection of free titles available, providing an accessible way to start incorporating new ideas into your daily routine.

Remember, changing your thoughts takes time and patience. Self-improvement is a journey, and I’m here to support you with the knowledge to succeed!